Back in November I attempted to launch a new look to my website and it was a big fail, majorly because the programmer decided to make me pay for a product that didn't actually work the way it needed to. Some of you experienced this along with me, noticing many things that weren't working or issues with the shop. That's not how I want to be represented, so I put a lot of time into working on fixing it myself, then trying to relaunch it in a new way (that never went live) and then eventually coming back to what I had in the very beginning. All of that is to say I spent about 90% of my day + time looking at and talking about kellypurkey.com. Through that time period the phrase that I use "modern day memory keeper" kept getting bounced around in my head like the ball in one of those Brick Breaker games.
If I had a dollar for every time I stared at the phrase, typed it, and said it out loud I could buy you all a donut. Every single one of you. I thought about it for so long that I began to turn against it. I was carrying a cloud of anger + frustration about my website debacle which somehow got displaced onto who I am as a business owner and in turn, what I am doing as a career. Modern day memory keeper? What am I even saying? Could I BE more pretentious and ridiculous and dumb. It began to lose its meaning to me. The term I'd coined to define myself no longer made any sense to me.
So I ended up paying a large invoice for the new website, then deleted the new website, and told myself that I had to chalk it up as a business lesson and put it in the past (hahaha because I am really good at doing that.) I needed to feel better about myself as a business woman again and I definitely wanted to feel confidence about making business decisions again. I really felt the desire to want to embrace what I have created, including being a modern day memory keeper.
The answer came in the form of my three best friends from childhood because of course - aren't they the answer to so many things that I need in life? We spent some time together over the holidays and one night when we were in my parents' home hanging out in the basement just like we used to (with bottles of wine included now that we're older, what a perk to growing old) I brought out my scrapbook that I'd made of our senior photos. Fifteen years ago. I have a scrapbook of our first ever trip to Europe that we took together when we were sophomores in high school. I love looking through those albums, we were just babies. And then as I was uploading photos from New Years Eve, which is so very special + wonderful to all of us when we get to spend this holiday together along with their husbands, it dawned on me. I am The Memory Keeper! I am!
I am the one who documents it all. Who always has the camera and always makes them pose for photos and who prints them out and puts them into albums. I am the keeper of our memories. Of the memories I make with the incredible friends and people I am lucky to spend time with all over the world. I get to be the one who preserves those moments we have together in my scrapbooks. And when I think about it, when I bounce that phrase around now in my head, it feels like such an honor.
I don't scrapbook as much anymore and I'm sure if you've been a longtime blog reader that you've noticed I don't post about scrapbooking even a small fraction as much here as I used to. There are new ways of recording and documenting and sharing photos now and I think I've evolved with how things have changed. But one thing that I know now will always be the same is that I will continue to be the memory keeper. With that modern twist thrown in. That phrase I wanted to drop kick a month ago, now fills me up and helps me head in a direction I'm excited to bring my business along to.
This is going to be a great year, you guys.
I was a guest on an episode of One Part Podcast with my friend Jessica Murnane back in December, talking about modern memory keeping and sharing things online. It's interesting to have my state of mind about things at that specific point in time recorded. Now you know more of the behind the scenes details, so if you haven't yet, give it a listen here. As always, I'd love to hear your feedback and thoughts.